Thursday, February 24, 2011

On Goings

An update is needed. I just don’t have it in me at the moment to blog. I’ve been busy. Between school and interviewing service providers for Aaron I am lucky to get good nights sleep, which I normally do not get. I am lucky if I get to watch Grey’s Anatomy within 24 hours of its airing. If I do, I am getting in my ME time.

Eric and I chose a service provider for Eric’s therapy. Having an autism diagnosis enters in a whole new kettle of fish. I wasn’t just going to go with anyone. In British Columbia, once your child is diagnosed you apply for funding for therapy, get approved and find a provider.

I have heard that it’s best to find one that offers all services under their belt and other parents have said hire individually as you get more bang for your buck. At this point, I just want to get therapy implemented and if I feel that Aaron’s needs aren’t being met we will reevaluate things.

I still have yet to connect with other parents in the area walking this walk. It’s most frustrating… but most people volunteer with these organizations.

I am sitting at B right now in Bio. Not too shabby considering I haven’t been applying myself as much as I’d like to with all this stuff with Aaron my mind is elsewhere. And I’ve had a cold I haven’t been able to get over; Eric and I are having issues – which contribute to my not sleeping. Some of my friends have some major life issues going on that need my support, so not too shabby. I wish things weren’t so with my friends and wish I could help but sometimes all I can do is listen.

I did manage to watch Grey’s Anatomy tonight. I was thinking of a post that SIF did the other day about infertility in TV land and the unrealisms (I just made this up) of it is pissing me off. By no means, am I an IF expert but I have an avid interest in it and have been reading blogs for years, and was almost an egg donor so I think I know a few things.

Last week Meredith was getting a shot in the ass as part of her fertility treatment… Which I know is protocol in some IF cases BUT to my limited knowledge a shot in the ass is for an HCG shot to trigger the eggs just before they’re collected and when a woman is injecting progesterone to sustain a pregnancy. If eggs are being produced en masse for an IVF cycle I believe the fertility drugs are injected in the stomach.

In tonight’s episode, Meredith’s vision is effected because of the fertility drugs… A dr. told her to stop taking them, and she said “But I only have 2 pills left in this cycle.” So what is it? Injections or pills? I wish the writers over at Grey’s Anatomy could do their homework a little better. What are they paying these researchers for?

This is what’s been on my mind. In my sleeplessness and stress I’ve got a few good pimples that need my attention before I hit the hay as I am flying solo with Aaron for the next 2 weeks so I need all the sleep I can get.

Monday, February 14, 2011

My Valentines Days Over the Years!

***Side note. I just went out to the car to get my cell phone and I saw 26 cents on the front seat that I grabbed and immediately thought of the song 26 Cents by The Wilkinsons. As soon as I came into the house is started up on the Galaxy Radio I had on TV. Freaky! And what does it mean???***

I have a lot of stuff going on in my life at the moment and I thought I’d pause and sum up my valentines days over the years some are funny some or not.

1990 (Grade 2) I remember watching the grade 7 girls get ready in the bathroom for their Valentines Day dance. One was too shy to wear the little back dress she was wearing and donned a t-shirt over it. I couldn’t WAIT until I was in grade 6 and 7 to go a Valentines Day dance! The girls were do mature and worldly!

1994 (Grade 6): I went to my first school dance held in after lunch in the gym. The girls were on one side of the gym and boys on the other. Classical. I actually danced with a boy (a 7th grader! Older man) with my hands on his shoulders and his hands on my hips. The aftermath of that was a crush and a few notes passed back and forth and nothing. But of course it was a BIG deal at the time.

1995 (Grade 7): I don’t remember anything of note mark any significance.

1996 (Grade 8): The boy I had a MAJOR crush on at junior high accompanied along with his friend to the corner store on our lunch break. It was a beautiful spring day (it really was) and I was in love. To get to said store we had to cross the ground of my old elementary school I remember former classmates asking me if he was my boyfriend to which I replied “were just friends.” Secretly hoping one day that would change.

1997: (Grade 9) I was at new high school and the boy of my affections was at my old junior high school. I think the focus was giving and receiving candy grams to and from friends. My friends and I probably discussed the object of our affections over lunch. My youth group at church held pot luck and he was there! He told me I put too much lemon in my Caesar salad dressing but otherwise liked it. I was convinced we would be married one day as he was already criticizing my cooking!

1998: (Grade 10) Nothing stands out for this year aside from the candy grams to send and receive from friends. I think I may have had a school crush but was too shy to do anything about it. I did have a grade 10 crush, but can’t remember what point during the year that he was the object of my affection

1999: (Grade 11) I spent the afternoon with a guy that I wasn’t certain I liked or not. Valentines Day fell on a Sunday. We went for a walk around the lake by my house and he got me a chocolate heart that he had taken a bite out of. Classy class. I think he saw another girl after me, but I am not too sure. If he did, I didn’t care as I was uncertain about him.

2000 (Grade 12): On the heals of a break up with my first real boyfriend of 8 months we agreed to spend it together. We went out to dinner at the Old Spaghetti Factory and I was home early. I can’t recall if we fooled around in the back seat of his car or not. I never should’ve spent it with him as I hurt him when I broke up with him and it was kind of adding salt to wound.

After he dropped me off, I went over to a guy’s house that I was seeing and we made-out and watched a movie. No pressure. Not my finest moment. I think I liked his car more than him.

2001: After the heals of ANOTHER break up with the first boyfriend he refused to spend V-tines Day with me. He learned from his mistakes. One month shy of my 19th birthday, a friend told me to hit a club with her and her friends (if I got in, which I did.) There was a group of guys and girls that were friends of friends and I met my soon-to-be-rebound boyfriend. It didn’t last long. We made-out that night, he drove me to the Skytrain and we dated for a month. While I was in the Skytrain Station waiting do my train some drunk guy slurredly and asked me to be his valentine. I said I had one and tried to ignore him until my train arrived.

2002: I really don’t remember this one at all. So nothing significant happened. I probably worked

2003: I was suppose to spend it with my dad, but we got into a fight and I high tailed it to Victoria to Eric’s. He worked that day and we were celebrating it on the Sunday. So I spent it travelling to Victoria and alone at Eric’s place while I waited for him to get off work the next morning. We celebrated on the Sunday night with dinner out at the The Swan Cafe. It would be come a favourite eatery of ours.

2004: I spent Valentines Day with a sick friend as Eric was back east on course.

2005: I met Eric in Seattle on the 13th where his ship was. He got us a room at fancy hotel downtown and we had the best pasta I have ever tasted some restaurant a few blocks away from our hotel. I can’t remember the name of it for the life of me but it started with a P and may have been near Bell Town?

2006: I had an Anti-Valentines Day party with my single friends at my buddy’s apartment as Eric was deployed. It consisted of myself, Sally, Adam (buddy) and his obnoxious roommate and a case of Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper and a bottle of Bacardi. It was a good night complete with Sally and I passing out and Adam’s ex-gf coming over to pay him a late night visit. Obnoxious roommate passed out by himself.

2007: At the moment I am drawing a blank sad I know.

2008: I baked Eric an apple pie he got me my favourite candies which I picked out lol and we went for dinner at the Swan CafĂ© completed with a trip to labour and delivery because I thought was in early labour at 32 weeks. What I thought were contractions was constipation. I didn’t think L&D would actually call my midwife and make her come in. All I wanted them to do was an internal and tell me everything was okay and send me on my way. But NO, they made her come. I felt awful.

2009: Drawing a blank. I blame it on baby brain.

2010: Eric took me out for dinner at The Mint. We had a good time followed by a drive.

2011: No plans. I am making Eric a pie he will (hopefully) get me a card. I did cards for Aarons’ daycare classmates (hell he isn’t even 3! And it’s already started) and made cupcakes for his daycare. When I left, he was hugging me around my neck as I put my shoes on from behind. Nothing is sweeter than hugs from my little man!

***EDIT*** Eric got me card, a candy, a bottle of white Bacardi and a bottle Beringer White Zinfandel. It was a good Valentines Day.

Happy Valentines Day!

Thursday, February 10, 2011

A Lot on My Mind

We got Aaron’s diagnosis. He has been disagosied with Autism Disorder. That’s the official diagnosis. They no longer say “Asperbergers” Or “High Functioning Autism.” I think that is the most frustrating as when you tell people that they don’t know where to place him. At first glance you think he is a happy normal child. It’s only upon close inspection you can note some things that are different.

This is a lot for Eric and me to process. It’s kind of like a cold slap on the face. You get a diagnosis and have all these questions and the team who diagnosed him are like “here’s a binder” to get the ball rolling. Like WTF? I have questions can you at least not answer them then and there?

I still don’t know all that is involved. The binder does lay it out pretty well. But I’d rather have a human tell me. I talked to Tara for a good long while last night as she has worked with ASD kids (Autistic Spectrum Disorder) she had a lot of useful info.

The first step is to get the funding needed and then to start interviewing service providers which will help with his therapy. I don’t know how much he will need or for how long. I still have yet to figure this out.

One thing I know is I don’t want ASD to define his life or who he is. I don’t even know if I will tell him as it may be who he becomes. My hope is by the time he is school aged and entering kindergarten this will be behind us and I don’t have to tell his school so he can start life fresh with no labels or for people to judge him before they know him

I can see how when this happens how other things can take a back burner. My volunteering as fallen behind, I don’t know what this bodes for school. And finding a job is probably out of the question as I will need to take him to therapy several times per week. Hopefully my 1 and soon to be 2 class schedule can be accommodated.

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Did I Over React or Do I Have a Right To Be Pissed?

I wrote this diddy up over in my communtiy at Blog Frog. I normally don't seek relationship advice but it's about a difference of opinions with Eric. I'd love input as I really don't know if I am in the right or wrong.

Friday, February 4, 2011

I Don't Like It Lying Down

Some of you may wonder what I do all day while Aaron is at daycare? You know as I am unemployed and and have nothing else to do but sit on,my butt all day and read blogs and blog. Well one of the things I do to pass time is get inked! And instead of getting something small as per the norm for me. I went big. Bigger than any of my previous tattoos.

Final product.

Eric got me a gift certificate for a tattoo for Christmas. I got a tattoo with it a few weeks ago. I know I wanted a black and grey flower of some sort and was pretty sure I wanted a lily. The artist drew this on me by hand. I am very happy and very pleased with it! The only thing I am not pleased with is this one hurt like a bitch. And I had to get while laying down. I have never gotten a tattoo laying down before. I've always straddled a chair and I prefer that. Laying down, I couldn't read and had nothing to take my mind off of the pain. Last time I barely felt it. This time I felt like a baby. But the pain is beauty, and a beauty this one is!


On the serious side of things. Since my unemployed ass can't find a job I started school this week. I am upgrading high school courses and want to apply for nursing. I've also thought of another job alternative the most wouldn't think of. I am giving very serious thought to joining either the Army/Navy/Air Force Reserves. I've found a unit and a trade I like and have to get my paper work in. I will not specify which branch of the Canadian Forces I will joining as would be too easy to pin point me. Going this route means I will not deploy, I will work part-time one evening and 2 weekends per month which will allow me to stay home with Aaron (not deploy) contribute to my family's income, get some experience to add to the resume and it's something I can do while going to university should I get accepted into my program.

Now I just need to get my ass in shape as Basic Training will kill me. (Held on weekends.)


On the autism front, Aaron's assessments are next week. We dont' know what to think or make. Some days we think he is a normal little boy other days some of his behaviors perplex us. Regardless of the outcome it's better to know than not. Aaron continues to develop at daycare and is participating in circle time and games. 2 months ago he never would've done this. I am still glad we decided to put him in. It's one of the best parenting decisions I think we've made for him.