Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Update of Sorts

At the moment I am hanging out at my dad's sans Aaron and Eric for a few days. The three of us made it here yesterday afternoon from my sisters and we spent the night. We took Aaron to a local water park and spent some family time together.

I have been have been more even keel now that I have been able to put some distance and time between the situation between MIL and I. I have done a lot of analyzing of the situation and I am not going to ponder it to death. I am going to write my MIL a letter and mail it, a heartfelt, constructive non accusing letter telling her how I feel. I don't want to just brush this under the rug and pretend it didn't happen. Visiting with my sister really helped, and she gave me some great insight and wisdom that only an older sister can.

There is someone else who is more at stake than me, and that's my innocent, beautiful son. despite my issues with MIL, she loves that boy. I don't know how future visits will be, but in the near future I don't foresee a visit. Eric will be away for 2 months come August, and will be deploying next spring and realistically he is the only one I would allow to take Aaron visiting to Alberta. One thing I am weary of in the future when he is old enough to make solo visits that she will talk me down to him.

I never want him put into this situation. My step-dad used to speak ill of my dad all the time and it broke me as a child. I want to protect my son from that hurt. My MIL is one to praise someone one minute and talk behind their back the next. She has done this with SIL, there is no doubt in my mind she talks about me. I am firm believer that someone gossips with you about his/her other friends and family, that the moment your back is turned they're talking about you.

I do not want Aaron subjected to this. Ever.

I will go to great lengths to protect my child. I am going to have to find a balance of things when he is a little older.

I am not going to write the letter in the next day or so as I want a little more time to think and digest the situation.

For the the next few days I am going to try to relax and get over this cold. My voice still raspy and I am still hacking up phlegm. So far today I went on a hike with a friend and went to a Bikram's yoga class. Tomorrow I will attend another hot yoga class and take it from there.

1 comment:

S.I.F. said...

I think a letter is a really great idea lady! It will give you the chance to say what you need to say without being too confrontational... I hope you can at least come to some kind of middle ground!